CRY!

Some days are just hard! Some days you just need to cry! Some days you just need to cry a lot! Today was one of those days. I’m not exactly sure what triggers those days….hormones, weather, disappointment, life….but whatever it is, it makes for brutal days, and even worse…brutal nights. FYI, I am an empath! Sometimes when we say we are an empath people may roll their eyes a bit, or even think that maybe in some way we are bragging on ourselves, as if we have some firmer grasp on emotions than everyone else. That’s not at all what being an empath means to me. For me, being an empath, simply means that I feel EVERYTHING…ALL THE TIME! It’s wonderful and it’s horrible! I think we all benefit from empathy, but being an empath involves more than just having empathy for others. It involves every fiber of my being feeling every hurt, every sorrow, every disappointment and every loss….not just for me, but for my entire family and it even extends to people I do not, nor will I ever know.

What does that have to do with my blog? Well, first of all it helps you to know me a little better, but it also explains why the issue of LGBTQ acceptance is so important to me. I have not only a child, but her friends and others that I have now met, and even more that have reached out to me through facebook or this blog, to say how badly their families, their friends and their churches have hurt them. They are being ostracized from their entire support system because of who they love…..it’s not about who they have sex with y’all…..it’s about who they LOVE! It’s about who they need to have in their lives, with whom to walk through the good and the bad, to support, to lift up, to encourage. It’s the same love that you have for your spouse…..and it’s beautiful! It’s not a sin to love and it never was and it never will be! When I hear these stories, repeatedly, it empowers me to keep speaking…..BUT….it also breaks my heart over and over again! We have personally lost friends…oh they “support” us to an extent, but it’s like the elephant in the room that no one wants to address, because really….if you don’t support my daughter for who and how she is….you don’t REALLY support us. Bottom line….that hurts, people are hurting, people are homeless, people are committing suicide, people are begging for acceptance and we can not hear them because of…..I argue….pride, tradition and sadly, someone being gay just makes you plainly and simply uncomfortable! It is a known psychological defense mechanism that when something makes us uncomfortable, or when we don’t understand, we tend to surmise that there must be something wrong with it! There is a history of changes in church doctrine based on new things that we have learned and of which we have gained a better understanding. Preaching from the pulpit has changed based on experiences throughout history and in our society. For example, we no longer persecute the Jewish community from the pulpit, (which happened in the early 1900’s), we no longer segregate our churches based on race, we no longer condone slavery from the pulpit, we no longer punish women for speaking out in church, or cutting their hair, or wearing make-up or jewelry! And there is plenty of New Testament scripture addressing these issues. If we can re-examine scripture on these painful parts of our church history, surely we can begin to at least acknowledge that maybe it’s time to do the same with scripture referencing the LGBTQ community! I promise you! THERE IS MUCH TO LEARN! The truth of the matter is we DO change how we see things, we DO change how we understand things and when we don’t….when we stand firm on something so clearly brutal and cruel….we are no longer being the hands and feet of Jesus!! And quite frankly, THAT MAKES ME CRY!

I will be better tomorrow! I will be stronger tomorrow! I will continue my fight tomorrow! I will not give up….it’s just too important!